|Women are particularly victims of body-shame-based
oppression. Kudos to you for offering them some hope of
relief. One of the most harrowing relationships I ever
had was with a |
classically "beautiful" and physically
perfectly healthy woman who suffered chronic body
dysphoria. She hated her body, but made a successful
living in modeling. It's a horrible disorder. Our
culture obviously pushes a degree of it on all but the most
truly "liberated" women who transcend the constant and insane
pressure to make their bodies fit one mold (though not to say
this is the only issue contributing to clinical
dysphoria). In my understanding, many physical health
problems (such as obesity, for one) are often exacerbated or
even initially caused by shame. Every child should be
told every day from birth, "You are beautiful just as you
are. Now treat yourself well so that your beauty can
continue to flourish."
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Your article on sexual abuse was wonderful and will give me
some good back up in my argument with family members. I come
from a long history of generational sexual abuse. Nudity was
forbidden in my home because of the things that went on with
my mothers family. We we're taught that if someone sees you
naked, your inviting them to hurt you and that the body was a
secret you must always cover up and protect. It made for some
very curious and confused teenagers.
From infancy, I have always fought to sleep nude. Frankly,
clothes are uncomfortable to sleep in. You can imagine the
constant battle in my home as a child. When I had my own
child, I vowed I would respect his feelings about nudity and
allow him to develop his own preferences. His father and I did
not run and hide to cover our nakedness. We went on with life
as normal and he never seemed to mind. My son has friends that
see "boobs" on TV and they make a big deal out of it. My son
doesn't seem very interested. He does not find the human body
a mystery and he is able to ask me any questions without
I am currently at war with my boyfriend about nudity and
children. I have a 10 yr old and if he walks in the room while
I'm dressing, it causes a huge issue with my boyfriend who
says its damaging my son. I figure that when my son gets to
the age that he feels he needs to be private, he will let me
know and I will respect that. So far he shows no interest in
my body. He has NEVER made a sexual statement or even acted
stimulated. I would just like someone else out there to agree
with me that my way of living has taken away some serious self
esteem issues with my son, made him more respectful of people
for who they are on the inside, enabled us to have a very
open, communicative relationship free from fear and
condemnation and broken a long cycle of abuse and
Am I expecting too much from mainstream society to respect
my feelings on nudity? I have said a million times and I will
say it again. It's not the naked body that creates sexual
deviance but a deviant mind who could find perversion in
anything. I ask then who are the real perverts, those living a
natural life or those walking around always dressed having
perverse thoughts? I'm sorry to ramble it's just that this
issue causes me much stress. Again, thank you for your
article, I will be sending a link to your page to those who
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I wouldn't have
even dreamed of saying it any better than the words on this
site! Coming from a religious family and personal
background, the arrow(s) hit dead center on the circle of
rings (target)! GOOD STUFF!!!!!!!!!!!!
THANKS FOR SHARING YOUR INSIGHTS!!!!!!!!!!!!! I SEE
THINGS THE SAME WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
* * *
WOW Your website
reject-shame is outstanding. I read the article (Shame,
Children, and Abuse) several times and finally just printed
it. I sat down with my wife and read it together. We even
decided to go out on a limb and share it with a friend of ours
that has had some abuse in her family. She is not a nudist,
but those words just make so much sense.
* * *
I am happy to see I am not the only one who sees Satan's
perversion and deception of GOD's very good creation. I
go a little farther with that thought.
Anyone preaching the "naked is nasty" is PERFECTING Satan's
perversion of GOD's very good creation, and is following Satan
on that issue. Something so clear in all Bibles I
have seen (the wording) should be preached from all Christian
and Old Covenant pulpits. Instead, the Seminary trained
Preachers are parroting the training they received in State
Seminary schools. This opens up another can-o-worms not
related to nudity, but shows why preachers are indoctrinated
the way they are.
An example is Romans 13. Yes we are to submit to our
Authorities. Hebrews 13, particularly :7 & :17
clearly state WHO our Authorities are. Worldly
"authorities" club Believers over the head with this one, to
their own demise before God.
Another example: The 'do not cause anyone to
stumble'; This is misused for any 'cause' that someone
does not understand. Therefore, no matter what we do, we
are "causing someone to stumble", by their reasoning.
Worldly "authorities" like to use this reasoning for their
gain over Believers.
Another example: 'Turn the other cheek'. Yes, if
someone strikes you on the cheek, turn the other to him,
also. Yet, no where in the Bible are we to be someone's
punching bag. I say on this; Yes, turn the other cheek
to someone if they strike us. If they strike the other
stomp a mud-hole in them and forgive them for their
transgression. The important thing is to forgive them,
but first you need to get their attention! The "be nice"
people definitely misuse this one.
Red Bluff, Ca.
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site! I noted your comment and link to my church --
May God bless your efforts to get the Word
out regarding His image.
Pastor Jeff Bowman - Fellowship Bible
Church, Anaheim, CA
* * *
Thanks for a site
that has the possibility of doing much good. I've only had
time to read a portion of it, but will come back to it.
Our US culture nearly universally produces shame-based
people. Once this is understood, examples are seen everywhere.
It goes beyond body shame, but body shame is a huge part of
the total problem.
Best wishes on your endeavor.
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Great site. It is one that I'd definitely be able to tell
others to look at, especially those suffering from the shame
issues you mentioned.